I Have A Book Problem

It will come as no surprise to those who know me well but for anyone who is reading this blog and has never had the privilege (yes, privilege I say) of making my acquaintance there is something you should know about me—I am a complete and total nerd when it comes to books. I love to read and always have. Ever since I can remember I have always had shelves full of books surrounding me. In fact, while most young children sleep with stuffed animals, I would actually sleep with my books when I was little (which, from the stories I am told about my childhood was probably one of my lesser oddities—thank goodness I am completely normal now--heh).

So before I could afford spending large amounts of money on books I used to love going to the library where my mom worked for a short time—browsing the shelves and always coming home with a stack full of books. I was so excited about the books I read that I wanted to share them with everyone and I even created a small library in room where my family and friends could “check out” books from my own personal collection. I was always getting free pizzas from the school BookIt program and one of my favorite shows was Reading Rainbow ("Take a look it's in a book of Reading Rainboooow...").

Perhaps one of the best childhood stories about my book-loving obsession that my mom likes to tell is how I totally (at least I think unknowingly) gave the figurative finger to some haters at the new school I started when we moved from Georgia to Pennsylvania in the first grade. See, the Pennsylvania educators didn’t believe my test scores were as good as they were since all southerners must be dumb hicks (which, okay, Honey Boo Boo Chile is not doing us any favors in dispelling that myth) so they gave me several of their own IQ tests. When they were finally satisfied that I wasn’t completely ignorant , I drove the I-told-you-so needle in even further by politely asking “now can you please show me to your library”?

Why tell these stories? Well I’m hoping that they will help you understand the confession I am about to make in that while (I admit) this problem I have is completely ridiculous it does have some historical bearing. It’s not pretty and I am not proud of it but I feel as if it is an omission I must make to control the madness.

Here goes.

I have a book buying problem. As of today I have about 80 books in my house that I have not read (but bought with the good intention of reading) and for whatever reason I keep buying more. I know what you’re thinking—I must be broke from buying books. Well no, not really. I buy most of my books when I am out thrifting at Goodwill so most of the time I get them for about a $1-$1.50 each which, you know, isn’t too bad in my opinion. A lot of the books I buy are classics that I feel I should be reading but there are also a lot of fiction books, some nonfiction books, and a few beach type reads that I think would be good guilty pleasures (in my crazy mind my unread books should have variety to accommodate whatever mood I might be feeling when I am never reading them).

I realize that there is a simple solution to this book obsession I have—stop buying books until I have read the ones I have--easy, right? Okay so I have tried that in the past and it lasted for maybe a couple months. The problem is that I am a slow reader and combined with work and everything else going on in my life I wasn’t making much progress. Then I would see a book at the thrift that I had remembered wanting to read and I would be like “it’s just one book, it’s no big deal.” Or “but it’s a classic—classics are different than just buying some trashy literature.” Thus the vicious cycle would begin again.

The whole problem really sucks –I like physical books and I like having them around me. There are worse things to be addicted to right? But in the sense of practicality and the fact that my current house does not have any extra room for a library (oh someday) I realize I have got to do something. I don’t really know what that something is but I am open to suggestions. One possible solution I have thought of is to publish my list of unread books on this blog so that you readers can give me the thumbs up/thumbs down on any that I either must read or ones where I shouldn’t waste my time. I purchased all the books on my list thinking they might be good so if there are any that you all out there have read that totally suck I would love to know. On the other hand, I would also love to get excited about any on the list so if there are some that are truly amazing must-read-right-away books, please do tell!

So, in all it’s glory I give you Ashley’s Unread Booklist (try not to be too judgey ok?):

Book Title	Author
The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie	Alan Bradley
The River King	Alice Hoffman
Made in America	Bill Bryson
Rocket Men	Craig Nelson
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius	Dave Eggers
Naked	David Sedaris
The Story of Edgar Sawtelle	David Wroblewski
The Age of Innocence	Edith Wharton
The House of Mirth	Edith Wharton
The Seamstress of Hollywood Boulevard	Erin McGraw
A Good Man Is Hard to Find	Flannery O’Connor
Love in the Time of Cholera	Gabriel Garcia Marquez
Middlesex	Geoffrey Eugenides
Waiting	Ha Jin
Atonement	Ian McEwan
The Grapes of Wrath	John Steinbeck
Freedom	Jonathan Franzen
The Postmistress	Sarah Blake
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies	Seth Grahame-Smith
Vanity Fair	William Thackeray
Their Eyes Were Watching God	Zora Neale Hurston
Innocent Traitor	Allison Weir
Saving Fish From Drowning	Amy Tan
The Pilot’s Wife	Anita Shrieve
Run	Ann Patchett
The Magician’s Assistant	Ann Patchett
The Shipping News	Annie Proulx
Nickel and Dimed	Barbara Ehrenreich
Animal Dreams	Barbara Kingsolver
The Stone Diaries	Carol Shields
The Heart is a Lonely Hunter	Carson McCullers
Lady Chatterly’s Lover	D.H. Lawrence
Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress	Dai Sijie
Snow Falling on Cedars	David Guterson
Outlander	Diana Gabaldon
The Fiery Cross	Diana Gabaldon
The Little Friend	Donna Tartt
Angela’s Ashes	Frank McCourt
When Everything Changed	Gail Collins
Madame Bovary	Gustave Flaubert
Collapse	Jared Diamond
The Eyre Affair	Jasper Fforde
The Namesake	Jhumpa Lahiri
Strange But True	John Searles
A Civil Action	Jonathan Harr
The Kite Runner	Khaled Hosseini
The Inheritance of Loss	Kirin Desai
War and Peace	Leo Tolstoy
The Master Butcher’s Singing Club	Louise Erdrich
Tara Road	Maeve Binchy
The Blind Assassin	Margaret Atwood
Gone With the Wind	Margaret Mitchell
Stiff	Mary Roach
The Omnivore’s Dilemma	Michael Pollan
American Gods	Neil Gaiman
Ender’s Game	Orson Scott Card
The Cotton Queen	Pamela Morsi
The Good Earth	Pearl Buck
The Constant Princess	Phillipa Gregory
The Boleyn Inheritance	Phillipa Gregory
Watership Down	Richard Adams
A Reliable Wife	Robert Goolrick
The Satanic Verses	Salman Rushdie
Shalimar the Clown	Salman Rushdie
The Birth of Venus	Sarah Dunant
In the Company of the Courtesan	Sarah Dunant
Affinity	Sarah Waters
The Little Stranger	Sarah Waters
Fingersmith	Sarah Waters
Adam and Eve	Sena Jeter Naslund
Jane Slayre	Sherri Browning Erwin
Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norell	Susanna Clarke
The Bell Jar	Sylvia Plath
The Once and Future King	T.H. White
Sarah’s Key	Tatiana de Rosnay
The Things They Carried	Tim O’Brien
The Girl with the Pearl Earring	Tracy Chevalier
In Cold Blood	Truman Capote
Life of Pi	Yann Martel
White Teeth	Zadie Smith